Battling idea fatigue
I was just reading this post over at Mike Lee's BizThoughts blog. He talks about the paradox of knowing something so well that you can't be creative or innovative about it anymore. You become so set in your ways that it's hard to remember what it was like before you were the expert. I've certainly experienced this myself, and I've taken to calling this situation, "idea fatigue."
Idea fatigue happens all the time. I experience it at work frequently, where I'm faced with a complicated problem that takes days to solve. I feel like I walk down the same path and slam into the same brick wall over and over again. For some reason, I just can't back up far enough to see an alternate path. Mike's post suggests that the best way to get around idea fatigue is to bring in someone else with a fresh perspective. Someone who hasn't worked on the problem can see all paths instead of just the one you've started down. I've used this technique any time I've worked on a problem for more than a couple days without finding a solution. The funny thing is, I've found another solution as well.
I started noticing a while ago that when I gave up on a problem, I ended up solving it very quickly thereafter. This first started happening several years ago at my second job, when I'd be sent down some rabbit hole to figure out how to make the browser do something crazy. I'd spend days trying everything I could think of before approaching my boss and telling him that I couldn't do it. No sooner would I leave his office then the solution would come to me. This pattern repeated itself several times and frequently enough that I began using it to my advantage.
I'm not sure if it will work for everyone, but for me, giving up on a problem somehow resets my thinking. It could have to do with relieving the expectation of solving the problem, or just wiping the slate clean enough to see another solution...either way, it works. Down with idea fatigue!
A tortured Valentine
So Valentine's day was a couple weeks ago now. My friend Shelby had read my Valentine's post and told me I was right on with everything I said. She then went on to tell me how she had tortured her boyfriend this year by sending him a bouquet of flowers at work. This is part of why I love Shelby, she and I have the same sense of humor...our evil minds think alike. Brilliant.
As we continued talking, Shelby had an even better story (which is pretty much the norm). This one was so funny and so involved that I begged her to blog about it specifically so I could link to it. Now, two weeks later, she finally has finished the story. Please, read the following two posts:
I defy you to find a funnier, more torturous Valentine's story. Having read it, you'll know why Shelby and I get along so well...and why I'm so glad she's on my side.
Don’t give up
I was a purple belt at the time, still in middle school. My brother and I were going to karate around three times a week. It was good exercise and kept us out of trouble...oh, and we loved beating the crap out of each other. I'm sure it wasn't any more or less than any other brothers growing up, the problem was that through karate, we both knew how to really hurt each other. But that's a story for another time. On this particular day, there was a different opponent.
The instructor had placed a brick between two planks and asked if anyone wanted to try to break it. Being young and lacking the forethought to understand exactly what was being asked, nearly every one of us volunteered. We formed a line, as you often have to in middle school, and one by one everyone took their shot. One by one, people left with hurt hands. And then it was my turn.
I sized up my opponent. It really didn't look all that big, maybe a couple inches thick. When I placed my hand on the brick, it was cool to the touch. Here goes nothing. I pulled back, closed my eyes, and slammed my hand into the brick as hard as I could. If you are unfamiliar with the sound of flesh and bone hitting concrete, then the sound this made probably would have sent a chill down your spine. I opened my eyes to reveal the brick, still in place; it hadn't moved at all. There was, however, an addition to its appearance: my blood. My hand was all cut up and sore, and I secretly feared I had broken a bone. Stupid brick, why didn't you break?
That moment stayed with me for some time. I kept going back and forth in my mind. Perhaps the decision to attempt the feat was foolish, I shouldn't have even tried. But, I thought to myself, if I had done it, I would have felt great. Of course, I didn't do it, so instead of wondering what it would have been like I have now tried and failed. And my hand hurt. A lot. As time went by, my hand healed though my ego most certainly did not. Stupid brick.
A few years later I was working out at the dojo. By this time I was a black belt, practicing with other black belts. One of the instructors brought out some boards and bricks that had to be removed. He said we could use them if we wanted because either way they had to go. We started playing around, breaking a few boards. Then, there were only bricks left. One of the other students walked up and broke one with ease, then invited me to do the same. Ah ha, Mr. Brick, we meet again.
As I stood over that brick, flashes of my first encounter went through my head. What did I do wrong the first time? It was one thing to be a foolish kid trying this, but now I'm a black belt, with other black belts watching...I have to do this. I placed my hand on the brick and felt the same stark cold I had felt years ago. Now or never. I pulled my hand back, let out a yell, and thrust my hand towards the brick. Oh no, I think I broke something for sure this time.
I felt my hand hit something really hard and I thought there was no way to escape injury this time. I opened my eyes to see my hand on the floor. I had tore through the brick and hit the concrete floor; the brick now lay in two pieces off to the side of my hand. Stupid brick.
Seriously? Spygate is this important?
Okay, I think I've officially woken up in a bizarre new world where the government cares more about sports than matters of commerce, defense, budgets, and diplomacy. There's the Roger Clemens steroids issue, which borders on being the government's business because the possession and use of steroids without a prescription is illegal. I can almost buy that it's the government's business because of that. The Patriots did not break any laws, only league rules, so why is Arlen Specter getting involved?
Well, Mr. Specter is a huge Philadelphia Eagles fan, and the Patriots defeated the Eagles in the Super Bowl a few years ago. I'm sure it was devastating, as I've just experienced...the big difference is that I can't waive the NFL's anti-trust exemption in front of anyone to listen to how much it hurt me. When the Daily Show calls you out as being involved only because of your team affiliation, you know you're doing something crazy. In the video that the Daily Show references, Specter admits that his first thought when hearing about Spygate was whether it affected the Eagles Super Bowl. It really warms my heart to know that we have distraught sports fans with their fingers on the button.
Now comes news that people are suing the Patriots over Super Bowl XXXVI. Are you serious? A former Rams player, two St. Louis fans who bought tickets to the Super Bowl, and others are suing the Patriots for $100 million over the result of this game. Some gems from the filing:
It is the content of the Plaintiffs that but for the videotaping, known and unknown at this time, and based upon the results of the game by a field goal margin, the outcome of the game would have been different. Expert witnesses will testify on this issue.
So let me get this straight. An expert witness is going to testify to the fact that the Rams would have won were it not for some alleged videotapes? The filing states that the Rams were two touchdown favorites and basically implies that because everyone agreed that the Rams were the better team, they should have won. Funny, the Patriots were favored by almost two touchdowns in the Super Bowl and considered one of the best teams in the history of the league...I suppose that means the Giants cheated because there's no way anyone thought they could win.
Another gem from the filing is Kurt Warner's statement about the devastating effects of losing the Super Bowl:
After we lost the Super Bowl, the organization went into a bit of a downward spiral, as you see with a lot of teams who lose the Super Bowl. You look at Mike Martz. If he is a Super Bowl winner, that is a whole different thing. Or just maybe guys, that were their only change to be in a Super Bowl. And to go away losing it instead of winning it, that's a big deal.
So now it's the Patriots fault that the Rams organization couldn't recover from a Super Bowl loss? And for the fact that Mike Martz sucks as a head coach? This sounds so much like parents who think their kids are entitled to be on a sports team.
The lawsuit seeks damages for all St. Louis Rams players who didn't get their Super Bowl winning bonus (including the value of rings they would have gotten), everyone who bought tickets to the Super Bowl, and all Rams season ticket holders. Because clearly, if your team doesn't win the Super Bowl, you didn't get the appropriate value for your tickets.
For all the talk about preserving the integrity of the game, this lawsuit and Specter's inquisition threaten the very thing they want to protect. Can you imagine what would happen if every team that lost the Super Bowl could sue the other team? Or if ticket holders could sue opposing teams for not having the enjoyment of their team winning? I feel like I should sue for the emotional distress caused by watching the Super Bowl this year. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep. What about me? What about my pain???
All joking aside, there's no proof that anything happened at the Rams walkthrough. The fact that the organization couldn't recover from a Super Bowl loss is not the Patriots fault, it's the Rams' fault. Mike Martz is not a good head coach, how else can you explain not using the best running back in the game at the time (Marshall Faulk) against a team that had trouble defending the run? If he had won the Super Bowl, he still wouldn't be a good head coach.
The best thing that could've happened for the game is what Goodell did: he put it to rest. The NFL isn't a court system, it doesn't have to keep evidence for a certain amount of time if it believes the issue is closed. Dredging it up again only further hurts the integrity of the game. What's done is done, it can't be changed, sour grapes or not. No laws were broken, so the government should butt out and the lawsuit should be dismissed. Just move on. Isn't there something going on in Iraq that you really should be focusing on?
State your assumptions
I've had many people in my life that have influenced how I communicate with people, both written and verbal. In my master's program, I had a great professor for the applied research class whose job was to teach us how to write a good research paper. She was perhaps one of the clearest communicators I've met to date and really inspired me in a number of ways. Her points were succinct and meaningful; she rarely said anything that didn't matter. One of the most important lessons she taught was to always state your assumptions.
A lot of times we don't even realize that we're making assumptions. I sit in meetings...way too many lately...where I hear people rambling on about this or that without realizing that their perspective is based on an assumption rather than fact. Just to be clear, the difference between an assumption and a fact is that a fact cannot be disputed.
When dealing with intelligent people, the assumptions are usually logical progressions from some fact. And intelligent people typically have trouble determining assumption from fact because they're so smart that even their assumptions often prove to be true. In addressing a particular problem, though, it's really important to understand what you're assuming and what is an actual fact.
Sitting in a meeting with me, you'll often hear me interject, "I think you're making an assumption about..." I do this to make sure we're all on the same page. Assumptions are fine if you understand that that's what they are; they are detrimental when you treat them as fact. I then usually suggest that we put aside the assumption for now and think about the problem based on the facts at hand. A lot of contention can be quickly diffused by pointing out the assumptions, incorrect or not, and then moving on.
Assumptions creep into your mind without warning. A good example happened over the past week at work. Steve and I are working on a new project that is based on some work we've already done. We had hit a roadblock in building out the solution to the proper scale. At some point, we realized the issue was an assumption we were making. We had assumed that all of the components used in the prior work were necessary in the new project...we spent too much time trying to fit square pegs into a round hole. Once we realized this was an assumption, we were able to move on and design the system.
The next time you're feeling stuck for frustrated with a problem, think about the assumptions being made and call them out. Hell, write them down if you have to. A lot of times just surfacing the assumptions is enough to move things forward.
A message for former Yahoos
As I'm sure everyone has heard by now, this was a rough week at Yahoo! as a bunch of people were laid off. I just wanted to post a quick note that if you were one of those people and are looking for another job, contact me. I have contacts at a bunch of companies, both small and large, that I'd be happy to use to help people land a new gig.
The perfect Valentine’s Day gift
In honor of Valentine's Day and somewhat inspired by Mike's post about his cheesy romantic idea, I figured I'd do a romance-themed post for a change. I, like Mike, am a romantic...perhaps not as cheesy as Mike, but a romantic nonetheless. I'll admit to doing some cheesy things for girls, and I do so shamelessly. Since I'm flying solo this year, I thought I'd share my perspective on gifts for Valentine's Day so that others may benefit.
Typically when Valentine's Day comes along, guys get scared. It's not just about buying a gift for her, like Christmas, it's about buying the perfect romantic gift. And if you mess that up, well, might as well be thinking about what you can do to make it up to her. Girls, on the other hand, live for this holiday and are always coming up with great ideas. There's nothing that girls do that we guys can't, it just takes looking at things a little differently.
If you think you need to spend a ton of money on her, you don't (and if you really do, perhaps it's time to re-evaluate the relationship). The perfect romantic gift is not about money, it's about being unique, being thoughtful, and being personal. It should be something that shows you understand her. How do you show that? She's your girl, I hope you listen when she talks! She's telling you all about herself all the time. This doesn't mean you have to get her exactly what she mentioned, it could be something mildly related. For instance, suppose she's always dreamed of going to Paris, a great gift for her could be flowers coupled with a snowglobe of the Eifel Tower. Does she like a particular sports team? How about a customized jersey with her name on the back? If you can figure out how to give her a small part of her dream, you've got a great gift. It shows that you're paying attention to her and that you understand what she wants out of life.
The uniqueness of the gift is important as well. Anything you've ever given to any other girl in your entire dating history needs to be removed from consideration. Seriously. This isn't a fill-in-the-blank holiday, this is your chance to shine so don't ruin it by rerunning a previous Valentine's Day. Your girl deserves something as unique as she is.
Now let's talk about flowers. Flowers are good, understand? No matter what you give her, you should accompany it with flowers. They don't have to be given at the exact same time as other gifts, but they do need to be given. Just be sure you understand the effect flowers have on a girl, not just any flowers will do. A good rule of thumb is the longer the relationship, the more powerful the flowers can be. A new relationship (just a few months) calls for something simple. Skip over the dozen roses and go for a bouquet with tulips, or if you know her favorite flower, mix in some of those. Red roses should be reserved for longer relationships that have experienced at least one or two Valentine's Days together. If by the third Valentine's Day you haven't pulled out the red roses, make sure you do it!
Another note about flowers: send them to her work. This is an absolute must (assuming she has a job, of course). You can save other gifts or dinner or whatnot for after work, but the flowers must be delivered to work on Valentine's Day. This is important for a couple reasons. First, all the other guys will be doing it and you don't want to be the unthoughtful guy of the bunch. There's some poor girl whose guy inevitably forgets and she spends all day feeling lousy. Second, she wants to brag about what a wonderful guy you are to her co-workers. She wants people to wonder who the thoughtful person was that sent the beautiful flowers. Give her that.
A simple, thoughtful, unique gift makes the perfect Valentine's Day present and its effect can last for far longer than that day. In closing, I'd like to share a personal story. I believe it was around 2004 and my girlfriend at the time was a first grade teacher. We had exchanged gifts when she said that she had something else for me. She disappeared into another room and then reappeared with something.
"We made Valentines today in school with the kids," she said, " and I made this for you."
She revealed a red piece of construction paper, liberally sprinkled with glitter. There were white and pink cutout hearts that had obviously been afixed using a glue stick and sparkly lettering spelling out, "I love you." I was completely taken aback by this gift, its simplicity only enhanced the sweetness and authenticity of the message it delivered. I honestly can't remember having received a more pure gift in my life. I don't remember anything I gave her that year or anything else that she gave me, that's the impact that this gift made.
Simplicity and thoughtfulness go along way on Valentine's Day. Don't overthink it, but make sure it's unique to her and you'll be fine. I hope that everyone spends Valentine's Day with someone special. And guys, don't forget to send your mother a little something.
Super Bowl depression
I really contemplated not posting about the Super Bowl at all, as the only way I was able to get out of bed today was to block all memories of that cursed event from my head. But I feel like the only way I'm going to be able to move on is to face this tragedy head-on, let everyone get in their jabs, then forget it ever happened.
The Giants outplayed the Patriots, that's the bottom line. As much as it pains me, they deserved to win. Even though the Patriots were ahead for most of the game, the Giants really were in control the entire way. The Patriots offensive line disintegrated under the Giants pass rush, leaving Brady with no time to do anything. I thought the Patriots defense did an enviable job for three quarters, only allowing a field goal...but you knew they couldn't keep it up. The Giants offensive onslaught was just too great and the Patriots defense was on the field way too long.
Football is all about patterns, and the patterns I was seeing during the game disturbed me. One classic pattern is a missed interception opportunity where, one or two plays later, the team pulls off a huge play and eventually scores. Twice on the Giants' final drive the Patriots could have had an interception, and twice they didn't come up with it.
So that's it. The Patriots spent all last offseason figuring out a way to get past the Colts so they beefed up the offense. This offseason, they'll need to beef up the defense to compete next year. And they'll need to figure out if this offensive line is really good enough to go up against brutal pass rushes that they'll likely see every game next year.
I just need some time to pull myself together...
On hope
When you think of the word "hope," it probably conjures up light and fluffy thoughts. Hope is generally considered to be a good thing, a feeling that people generally like to feel. The dictionary defines hope as, "to desire with expectation of obtainment." The key with hope is that the outcome is somewhat expected though not guaranteed. There is doubt, and the doubt is what makes hope so addictive.
Gambling is the ultimate example of hope addiction. The people who sit in front of slot machines for hours on end are stuck on the hope that the next pull will yield a better result than the previous. They all know that there's a possibility, and a pretty good one, that the next pull will result in no payout at all. But it's the hope that there will be a payout that keeps them going. Every small payout eggs them on. Look, it's possible to win so I know it can happen. How often do you see someone win big in a casino and them gamble away the winnings? It's not the gambling itself that they can't break away from, it's the hope of a payout.
Hope and disappointment are closely related. The definition of disappoint is "to fail to meet the expectation or hope of." When you hope for something and don't get it, you're disappointed. Someone singing in a karaoke bar to have fun is not disappointed; the same person singing in front of a talent agent may be disappointed because of the hope of being signed. It's the same activity, just different circumstances. The difference is the hope attached to the latter situation makes disappointment a more real possibility.
Hope can get us through tough times, as many prisoners of war can attest, but when hope is left alone without even a hint as to the outcome, it transforms into another state. This state is uncomfortable and is a balancing act between hope and disappointment called doubt.
Doubt isn't quite the opposite of hope though it's close. Doubt supposes that the expected result might not occur, and the anxiety caused by bouncing back and forth between hope and doubt is what I call angst (though this is not the book definition). You're really hoping that something happens but you're starting to believe it probably won't. The possibilities swirl in your head...all the reasons it could happen...all the reasons it might not. The longer you wait for a result, the worse you feel.
One of the precepts of Buddhism is that suffering is caused by attachment: attachment to things, attachment to people, attachment to outcomes. Attachment to outcomes is closely related to hope. Hoping for a particular outcome and not getting it leads to disappointment, and disappointment is a feeling of suffering. If you can release attachment, so they say, you will not experience suffering.
Following that theory, you experience less suffering if you have no hope. I know it sounds kind of grim, but hear me out. If hope leads to disappointment and disappointment is suffering, then stopping hope means stopping suffering; it's simple logic. Without hope, there is also is no angst. Since angst is hope plus doubt, removing hope simply leaves doubt, and doubt alone is not nearly as disturbing as angst.
In my world, hope is reserved for things over which you have no control. If you have a tumor, you hope it's benign, and yes, you even hope that the Patriots win the Super Bowl. You should not hope to get a raise, you should work to get it; you should not hope to have plans Saturday night, you should make it happen.
When I want something, I don't hope for it, expecting it to magically appear just because I want it; I do everything in my power to get it. If I fail, I fail knowing that there was nothing else I could do. There is something comforting about knowing that you gave it your all even if the desired result wasn't achieved.
Like most feelings, hope is neither good nor bad, it just is. The proper application of hope can galvanize efforts while the improper use can lead to complacency and suffering. I think it's an important distinction to make: is this something I should hope for or is this something I should work for?
Super Bowl prediction
So I've resisted the urge to talk about football for the past two weeks because, quite frankly, there's only so much pre-game hype I can stand. Now that we're within a couple days of the game, I feel it's appropriate to start talking football seriously again.
The conference championship games were interesting, for sure. Brady looked horribly off in the AFC Championship game, but the team was good enough to pull it out against a hobbled Chargers team. Even though I think he's a punk, I have to give Philip Rivers credit for playing the entire game and playing well. He made LT look a little silly for sitting out. Another playoff game with only one Moss reception? No big deal, if two defenders are on him the entire game, that just leaves other guys open.
I was shocked that the Giants managed to beat the Packers. The theory that bad weather plays to the favor of the underdog was proven, as the Giants were able to keep it close enough to pull out a victory in the end. And I was so looking forward to beating the Packers in the Super Bowl as revenge for suffering through the horrible brow beating we took at their hands when Bledsoe was still the franchise in New England.
I expect the Super Bowl to be a good game, and I really hope both teams play with the same intensity that marked the week 17 encounter. That truly was one of the best games I saw all season and despite my heartburn as the Giants shredded the Patriots defense, I enjoyed every minute of that game. The bad news for the Giants is that Belichick and Brady have a ridiculously good record against teams they face twice in a season. I expect the defense to be tighter and the offense to be on fire.
That being said, it wouldn't be an enjoyable championship without beating a Manning to get there. The Chargers ruined the chance for us to beat Peyton, but at least we have Eli to look forward to. Patriots by 14 (bet the spread!).
